摘要：When you have social anxiety, walking into a room full of people can make you feel like every eyeball in the place is boring direc
双语正文
When you have social anxiety, walking into a room full of people can make you feel like every eyeball in the place is boring directly into your soul, and that nothing you say will possibly be smart or funny or coherent enough. That can trigger an array of physical, cognitive, and emotional symptoms. “For some people, it might mean a racing heart and dizziness and feeling flushed ,” says Kirsten Hall-Baldwin, a licensed clinical professional counselor in Chicago. “Others might be in these thought spirals, or feel like their mind is going blank or freezing.”
如果你有社交焦虑，那么当你走进一个人满为患的房间时，可能会觉得所有人的目光都直直投向你，仿佛要穿透你的灵魂；你可能也会认为，自己说出的每一句话都不够聪明、不够有趣，甚至不够连贯。这样的感受可能会引发一系列生理、认知和情绪上的反应。芝加哥持证临床专业心理咨询师克斯汀·霍尔-鲍德温解释说：“有些人会心跳加速、感到头晕或脸颊发热。还有一些人可能会陷入思绪的漩涡，或者突然觉得大脑一片空白，一句话也说不出来。”
英/ kəʊˈhɪərənt /｜美/ koʊˈhɪrənt /
adj. 有条理的，连贯的；说话条理清晰的，易于理解的；团结一致的，凝聚的；（波）相干的，相参的；黏着的，黏连的
2、dizziness
英/ ˈdɪzinəs /｜美/ ˈdɪzinəs /
n. 头晕；头昏眼花
3、flushed 研英/ flʌʃt /｜美/ flʌʃt /
adj. 脸红的；因成功、自豪或激动等而兴奋的
v. 使激动（flush 的过去式和过去分词）
4、go blank
v. 一片空白：无法回忆或思考某事
Hall-Baldwin coaches her anxious clients to create a coping plan: a proactive list of strategies and techniques that can help temper their unease . Here, she and other experts share tips on how to carry a conversation when you have social anxiety.
霍尔-鲍德温会为存在社交焦虑的来访者提供指导，帮助他们制定一套应对计划：即一份预先准备的策略和技巧清单，以缓解他们在社交场合中的不安。在下文中，她将与其他专家一同分享多项实用建议，帮助社交焦虑者在交谈中表现得更加从容。
1、proactive
英/ ˌprəʊˈæktɪv /｜美/ ˌproʊˈæktɪv /
adj. 积极主动的，主动出击的；前摄的（前一活动中的因素对后一活动造成影响的）
2、unease
英/ ʌnˈiːz /｜美/ ʌnˈiːz /
n. 不安；不舒服
Practice in low-stakes settings
Before showing up at a networking event or your 10-year high school reunion , try making conversation with baristas , waiters, neighbors, or co-workers. These short interactions can be a low-pressure way to build self-esteem . “Smaller, manageable social interactions don’t carry as much emotional weight,” Hall-Baldwin says. “There isn’t necessarily a goal of having a deeply meaningful conversation, so it’s just trying to practice without feeling overwhelming pressure.” Over time, you’ll gain a sense of comfort and confidence as you venture into larger social settings.
在低压力场合中练习
在参加社交活动或十年高中同学聚会之前，可以先尝试与咖啡师、服务员、邻居或同事等进行简短的交流。这类互动是一种低压力的练习方式，有助于逐步建立社交自信。霍尔-鲍德温表示：“规模较小、容易掌控的社交互动不会带来太多情绪负担。因为并不需要以进行深入对话为目标，所以你可以单纯把它当作练习，从而避免感到过大压力。”随着时间的推移，你会发现自己即使在更大型的社交场合中，也能表现得更加从容和自信。
1、reunion
英/ ˌriːˈjuːniən /｜美/ ˌriːˈjuːniən /
n. （有组织的）聚会，团聚；重逢，团圆；再联合，重新统一
2、barista
英/ bəˈriːstə; bəˈrɪstə /
美/ bəˈriːstə; bəˈrɪstə /
n. 咖啡师；咖啡吧员
3、self-esteem
英/ ˌself ɪˈstiːm /｜美/ ˌself ɪˈstiːm /
n. 自尊（心）
Script some go-to phrases
Come up with and rehearse two or three simple conversation starters you can employ when your brain starts sputtering . That way, “you’ll have something in your back pocket to continue the conversation,” says Caroline Fenkel, chief clinical officer with the virtual mental-health platform Charlie Health. “You can keep it going without having to freeze and leave to go to the bathroom.” One of her favorites: “That’s really interesting—tell me more about that.” If you love traveling, ask people if they’ve gone on any recent vacations, or if you’re a foodie , find out if your conversation partner has tried any great new restaurants.
准备几个常用的开场白
提前构思并练习两三个简单的对话开场白，可以在你一时不知该说什么时派上用场。线上心理健康平台“查理健康”的首席临床官卡罗琳·芬克尔表示：“这样你就有了备用，可以把对话延续下去。不至于会突然冷场，最后只能找借口去洗手间。”她最常用的一句是：“这真的很有意思，可以再多跟我讲讲吗？”如果你喜欢旅行，可以问问对方最近有没有去过什么地方；如果你热衷美食，也可以聊聊对方有没有发现值得推荐的新餐厅。
1、rehearse英/ rɪˈhɜːs /｜美/ rɪˈhɜːrs /
v. 排练，排演；监督（表演者或团体）排演；默诵，默默地练习；详述，重复
2、sputter
英/ ˈspʌtə(r) /｜美/ ˈspʌtər /
v. 发劈啪声；气急败坏地说，结结巴巴地讲；飞溅出，喷出，唾沫飞溅；疲软地进行；喷镀
n. 劈啪声，喷溅声；急切的言语
3、foodie
英/ ˈfuːdi /｜美/ ˈfuːdi /
n. 美食家；吃货
Use the echo technique
One of the best habits for someone with social anxiety is paraphrasing what the other person said and then encouraging them to elaborate . For example, if they mention they’re struggling at work, repeat back their words with a question in your voice: “Struggling?” They’ll most likely launch into an explanation of what’s giving them a hard time. “People want to feel heard,” Hall-Baldwin says. “A lot of the time, just showing attentiveness can encourage the other person to keep sharing—and that takes some of the pressure off you to feel like you have to come up with original responses.”
善用“回声”技巧
对于存在社交焦虑的人来说，一个非常有效的习惯是复述对方说过的话，然后引导他们分享更多细节。例如，如果对方提到自己最近工作很不顺，你可以带着疑问重复一句：“不顺？” 对方大概率会因此继续解释，聊起让他们感到棘手的事情。霍尔-鲍德温表示：“人们都渴望被倾听。很多时候，你只需要表现出专注，就能鼓励对方继续分享——这也能减轻你的压力，让你不用总是苦思该如何进行回应。”
1、paraphrase
英/ ˈpærəfreɪz /｜美/ ˈpærəfreɪz /
n. 释义，改述
v. 释义，改述
2、elaborate 研英/ ɪˈlæbərət /｜美/ ɪˈlæbərət /
adj. 复杂的，详尽的；精心制作的
v. 详细说明，详尽阐述；精心制作
3、launch into
1. 突然开始做或说某事
2. 积极参与某事
Find an anchor
Holding a cold drink, touching an object like a fidget toy , or simply pressing your feet into the floor can give your nervous system something to anchor to when you’re feeling anxious. Research suggests it can bounce you back to the present moment and curb feelings of anxiety. “It helps signal to your brain: I’m safe,” Fenkel says. When she does public speaking engagements, she puts a worry stone into her pocket, which is a smooth, oval-shaped gem with a thumbprint-like indentation . “Every time I get nervous, I just touch it,” she says. Doing so creates a physical sensation of security that propels her to the finish line.
寻找一个“安全锚”
当你感到焦虑时，可以尝试手握一杯冰饮、触摸一个小物件（比如解压玩具），或者双脚用力踩在地上，这些动作能为神经系统提供一个“锚点”，帮助你稳定情绪。研究表明，这种方法能把注意力迅速拉回当下，有效缓解焦虑。芬克尔解释说：“这相当于向大脑传递一个信号：我是安全的。”她自己在进行公开演讲时，总会在口袋里放一块“安心石”——一种光滑的椭圆形小石头，上面有一个拇指大小的凹痕。她说：“每当我感到紧张时，就会摸一摸它。”这种触感所带来的安全感，能支撑她顺利完成演讲。
1、fidget toy
n. 抖动玩具：一种用于缓解压力、焦虑和无聊的小玩具，通常可以通过手指摆弄来达到放松的效果
2、gem
英/ dʒem /｜美/ dʒem /
n. （尤指切割、抛光或镶嵌过的）宝石，准宝石；难能可贵的人，不可多得的人；珍品，精品；用于颜色鲜艳的蜂鸟名中
adj. 最佳品质的
v. （如同）用宝石装饰
3、indentation
英/ ˌɪndenˈteɪʃn /｜美/ ˌɪndenˈteɪʃn /
n. 压痕，[物] 刻痕；凹陷；缩排；呈锯齿状；首行缩进
Have an exit strategy ready
The good news about social events is that they all eventually end—and your departure can arrive as soon as you’d like. You might feel better if you let your friends know from the start that you have an early morning and will be able to stay only until a certain time, or make it clear that you have an afternoon appointment that will keep brunch from turning into dinner. It’s also a good idea to brainstorm a few ways to politely wrap up conversations, Hall-Baldwin says. For example: “It was really nice talking to you—I’m going to check in with Jane.” Doing so can help reduce anxiety about feeling trapped in a conversation, she says.
提前准备好脱身的办法
值得庆幸的是，社交活动终究都会结束——而你完全可以决定自己何时离开。如果一开始就告诉朋友，你第二天要早起，只能待到某个时间点；或者说明下午还有安排，避免一顿早午餐被拖成晚餐，这都会让你心里更踏实。霍尔-鲍德温指出，提前想好几种礼貌结束谈话的方式也很有帮助。比如，你可以说：“和你聊天真的很愉快，我得去和简打个招呼了。”她表示，这样做能缓解焦虑，让你不再担心自己会困在某段对话中无法脱身。
1、brunch
英/ brʌntʃ /｜美/ brʌntʃ /
n. 早午餐
2、brainstorm
英/ ˈbreɪnstɔːm /｜美/ ˈbreɪnstɔːrm /
n. 灵感，突然想到的妙计；一时糊涂；献计献策会，自由讨论会
v. 集体讨论，集思广益
来源：趣闻捕手一点号
